Lessons from Ex With Benefits

From the net

I watched Ex With Benefits starring Coleen Garcia and Derek Ramsay and Iiked it. Contrary to comments that the movie which is now on its second week in theaters just sells sex, I actually found it relatable and educational. The saying that you should not judge a book by its cover is actually true in this movie. You have to watch it to be able to truly appreciate its value. After all, one cannot just comment about the things inside if he is just standing outside.

Well, I believe that the production really planned to include that scene in the thriller that got the ire of medical representatives. And who would not when if you would watch it, it really put them in bad light? With that alone, humans who are mostly judgemental were expected to conclude that yes medical representatives would sleep with doctors in order to reach their quota. But then, it was for me a calculated move by the production people behind this movie in order to generate a buzz. It was meant to intrigue, to create controversy so that the public will be curious and eventually watch the movie. They eventually removed that scene in the succeeding trailers but it managed to tease the moviegoers. People were entralled, it was such a tease. And yes, people watched.

So what was that all about? That line about cuddling being not part of Arki’s,(Coleen’s character),duty as medical representative? Is it really true that medical representatives would sleep with doctors to get an endorsement? Maybe yes, maybe no.

 But as far as Arki was concerned she had her reason, and that was to support her family, especially her dad who suffered mild stroke while trying to help her get back on her toes after she was devastated and committed suicide because of what happened to her relationship with Adam, (Derek), back in medical school.

And because she eventually took the role of being the family’s breadwinner, she worked as a medical representative and in her desire to bring food to the table she did everything she can including that of sleeping with doctors just so her products will be endorsed. She did it the wrong way and the movie did not dignify it. But at the same time, the movie gave viewers a message of hope: one should be given a second chance to redeem one’s self and start a life with integrity.

Moreover, Carmi Martin’s character said it right when she mentioned that it is not only Arki who did it the wrong way because there is an actress who sleep with her director, a secretary who goes to bed with her boss or that client to her lawyer. So it is reality. It is a generic possibility. And everybody who is doing that has his/her own reason. But Arki has redeemed herself when she eventually refused the innuendo of one doctor when she finally realized that she is a med rep whose duty is to sell medicines that can help people. 

Poverty is not a justification and there are ways out there to be able get an endorsement in a moral and legal way. In fact Carmi is a testament to it when she said she never slept her way to the top. 

Meanwhile Arki nailed it right when she said it was unfair for her to blame Adam what she did or what happened to her because it was her decision, it was her choice to make. It was her call. She knew it was wrong yet she did it. The movie taught us to admit our mistake, correct it and do our best not to repeat it again.

 At the same time, it also inculcated in us the message of forgiving oneself in order to move on. For how can you forgive others if you have not forgiven your self first? You can never pick up the broken pieces of your life if you yourself is broken. Sometimes we are too busy thinking of the possibility of forgiving and forgetting others that we have forgotten that we have not forgiven our own self first. We are very occupied blaming others for our misfortunes when in the first place it was us who decided to commit such action that has caused our misfortune.

 Adam was also correct when he said there is no cure for pain but to endure it. In life we are afraid to face our demons, too scared to confront the truth. We love to always run away from the pain, suspend the ache and pretend everything is just fine when deep inside us we are devastated. We put up a facade that everything is okay, when the truth is our heart is bleeding and weeping, that it is in the highest state of brokenness and emptiness.

It is also good that the movie painted a message of honesty and truthfulness expressed through Adam’s principle to endorse only products which are effective and will not be harmful to patients. He is a doctor with integrity, one who cannot be bought nor be persuaded by favors and under the table or on top of the bed arrangements.

There are some loopholes in the storytelling like its failure to explain how a medical student who had to take a revalida exam twice and had to be coached by his girlfriend when called upon to answer during class discussion eventually rose to become the country’s number one doctor 10 years after. 

The ending was trying hard and predictable. And if you think of it, it will create a conflict of interest because the teacher is in a relationship with his student. It will eventually put Arki in bad light again especially if she will have good grades and classmates will conclude that it is so because the teacher is in love with her.

Coleen’s acting is still inconsistent. She was supposed to break and weep in that scene with Derek in the hospital when she asked him to just let her go but her tears were scarce and it took a while before she successfully shed one. But oh my Coleen's screen presence is very strong! She will most likely be one of the biggest stars in due time. Derek is still it. His sexiness on screen still projects intense awesomeness, enough for viewers to scream and get excited every time he appears. He fits the role so much!

Nevertheless, those were forgivable because there were a lot of beautiful lessons you can picked from the movie that will be very helpful as we face the challenges life has to offer every now and then. What matters after all is you learn a thing or two upon leaving the theater.

Choose Monbis!

It’s so hot hot hot! All of us would probably buy swimming pool that can be put inside our bag if there will be one available in the market right now. But no, that is not going to be possible. Atleast not in this lifetime! So our next option is a thirst quencher. Ice cream will top the list for sure. If you buy in cone it’s affordable but surely not satisfying, you will crave for more, so you will have another cone. Not economical.

So our next stop is halo-halo. And there is a lot of this in Cebu. Some are overrated.  You are made to believe the version is yummy and really suits your taste, only to be disappointed when you get the chance to finally sample the product itself.

I have tried a lot of halo-halo specialties but this one is top of my list: Monbis! Located in barangay Tisa, along that long stretch of siomai stalls, you will see Edmon, the owner, personally preparing his special halo-halo which he sells at P65. Yeah it’s really special because Edmon prepares it with so much passion. It has banana, jackfruit, Hershey syrup, scoop of ice cream, graham biscuit, rice crispy and a lot more of ingredients that make it really a standout. Ahh, each spoonful tastes like heaven and you cannot get enough of it!

It was my third time there last Sunday evening but it was only then that we got to briefly talk. It’s called Monbis because it is a contraction of his name and that of his wife Bambi: The Mon in Edmon and Bi in Bambi. The S was just added for sound effect. He opened two years ago where he also served meals (his beef stroganoff was very lami), until he decided to just concentrate in serving halo-halo because he and his assistant cannot cope up with the demand anymore. Edmon is so hands on. I thought he finished culinary arts. But no, he holds a degree in accountancy, worked at a pawnshop and a bank until he decided to quit and open Monbis saying, “fix man ang sweldo didto.”

 He serves halo-halo for five hours only every night or from 7pm to 12 midnight due to space constraints since like the siomai stalls along that stretch, he utilizes the road too for the tables and chairs. But in that span of time, he can serve a hundred or more halo-halo every night. Because there is not enough space for his loyal and consistently growing clientele, one can opt for takeout.  You can also order ahead so that when you get there, you can eat right away. Yeah call Monbis @ 514-75-11 to avoid waiting in line!

Trust me Monbis special halo –halo is sooo lami you will not regret shelling out P65 a serving!

Two Words

 

I bought two sachets of coffee and two pieces of eggs at a neighborhood store. The sales girl was pretty. But then, I changed my perception of her right after she handed me the remains of my P100 bill. That was because, she never thanked me for my purchase. You see, I always have issues with people who do not say thank you and please. The former is a sign of gratitude and the latter signifies respect, sometimes humility. I base my perception of people in their ability to say these words and how they say these. I have friends who told me once that it is not actually what you say that counts, but how say it that matters. But I surely give emphasis on both.

Anyway, the inability of people to mumble these beautiful magical words disappointed me for a time. But then I realized, you cannot blame them or scold them for that because it all goes back to how they were raised. It is a matter of attitude. When you grow up in a grateful family, centered on respect and faith, these magical words become like second skin to you----you feel naked if you cannot say them everytime a favor is granted or when you ask for one.

I am not sure, but it was either Pope Benedict XVI or his successor Pope Francis who said that there are only two words that you need to be successful in this world : Thank you and Please. I so agree. It is because, being able to deliver these words whenever the need arises will surely bring you to places. Who will turn against you when you are respectful? We all love grateful individuals. And when we love, we only want the best for the person to whom we feel such affection to.

If you have been saying these words even before reading this piece CONGRATULATIONS. I am sure you have been receiving favors one after the other, grateful people are blessed in various aspects of their lives. But if you are among those who find it burdensome to mumble these words, your time is RIGHT NOW! You can still change the course of your journey in this world. I am sure, you have never been successful. If you are, I am certain you are not truly happy. But worry not because there is always a time for people who want to be good and do good.

As for that sales girl, the downside is I will not be coming back to their store for some time because I abhor ungrateful people. And when I finally return there but she is still the same, I would take it as an opportunity to teach her in a nice way, so she can learn and change the course of her journey too. Remember, you  have the power to change your life. Just learn to appreciate the beauty of being grateful and respectful. When you have already learned, be ready for not stop downpour of blessings and grace.

True Meaning of Faith

There is a time in our life that no matter how hard we try, nothing happens. We give it our best, yet we still fail. We start questioning what is wrong with us, what is our purpose on earth. Does God love us in the first place?

The answer is Yes, God loves us all the time, and never that he will forsake us even for a blink. It’s just that sometimes we are looking at the wrong direction; we are searching at the wrong place. Moreover, we are too stubborn to traverse the path God has designed for us.

You wonder, you go to hear mass daily, you pray whole-heartedly, you give penance—but it seems God is not hearing you, he has not seen the goodness in you. Actually, God has long seen you; he heard the desire of your heart already. The problem is it is you who does not listen, you refuse to see because you insist in having what you want you, what you desire because you have been praying for it for a very long time. But faith does not work that way.

Real faith is when you let go and let God. It means total surrender. It is all about letting God take charge of your life, let him direct your way, abide in the script that he has written for you since you came into this world.

Sometimes also, you have surrendered everything, yet the problems do not stop. You pray but what you get in return are more crisis, failures, disappointments, and pains. Do not give up then, that means God is now polishing your being so that you will come out more beautiful in his perfect time. The more faithful you are the more that you will be put to a test. But be happy then, because when you reach that level already, it signifies that glorious days are about to come for you.

Listen. Do not insist. Believe and let God. Keep the faith held high. Remember, the stormy your life will be while you are being faithful, the more beautiful the reward after that when it is time for the rainbow to shine on you.

Be A Nonito DONAIRE Jr!

 

Nonito Donaire Jr. is now a five division champion after defeating Simpewe Vetyeka in Macau on Saturday night. But Donaire was a bit unhappy of the result because their fight had to be stopped in the fourth round due to severe cuts in his both eyes. Those were caused by Vetyeka’s headbatting operations launched against Donaire since round one, much to the dismay of boxing fanatics since the referee never called it against the South African. Under the World Boxing Association (WBA) rules, when a fight has to be stopped in the fourth round, the score cards shall decide. And the figures favored Donaire:49-46.

During post fight interview, Donaire apologized to his fans and supporters for disappointing them by not giving a good fight. He bowed he tried his best since round one, but he did not have clear vision anymore as the blood and ointment were dripping toward his eyes due to the cuts he endured. That was why he asked for a halt. The pain was unbearable already for Donaire. Yet he apologized for the disappointment he had caused on everybody who believed so much in him.

 Donaire wanted to win impressively. That was why he vowed to train again after he has recuperated because he was very much open to a rematch. He said he has high respects for Vetyake who he described as a good boxer. A rematch would satisfy his fans and boxing fanatics as well. It will remove a cloud of doubt and erase what ifs and what nots. That is the beauty of boxing, you can always do a rematch to arrive at a better record and determine the real winner and powerful fighter. Most of all, you remove doubts and disappointment.

Life is also like boxing. Along the way we encounter a lot of what ifs and what nots, of what would have been and what would have been not. There are a lot of disappointment. We rise and fall, rise and fall again. It is a cycle. But there are those who are away and out of the cycle because they prepared and braced for what was to come. They are up there: Stronger. Bigger. Better. Brighter.

Imagine you are a parent. You are at the peak of your career, you are at the top of your game. What is on your mind? Enjoy the fruits of your labor and indulge in the end result of your effort? Anyway, life is a a cycle—you are up today and you are down tomorrow---you will bounce back eventually. You can opt for a rematch at life by starting over again. Or you think otherwise?

A responsible parent does not think that way. He wants to make it sure, safe, and sound so that when the going gets tough, he will not be a disappointment to his children. A thinking parent does not think of the possibility of a rematch, he wants it to be a perfect match for his children. So what do you so as not to disappointment your children in the future? You prepare. You save. You spare something now when everything is okay, so that when the challenging time comes, you have something to back you up. That way you will not stumble and eventually fall.

When I say save and spare something now, I mean be financially literate. Get to know Quick and Fast Credit Cooperative (QFCC), a C.H.R.I.S.T-centered cooperative that aims to “Help People Help Themselves.” It has various savings packages that will give you better deals and will allow you to be of help to others. When you open an account at QFCC and become a regular member, you automatically become part of the “Business Club” where you enjoy free entreprenurial mentorship so that when you are ready to manage your own business, you can do so by availing of a loan for your starting capital.

But if you do not want to manage a business, that will not be a problem. By being a member, your savings will grow still because it will be entitled to a 3% annual interest. QFCC has Kiddie and Youth Savings, Educational Savings and a lot more. You just have to choose the savings package that suits you and you desire. Actually, the most interesting savings package that has caught the attention of new members is the “Helping Hands.” Under that savings package your P300 initial deposit will be deducted with P5 for hospitalization and P10 burial assistance to members in need. It is just a small amount, yet it will surely go a very long way and you are able to help at the same time. Remember, the more you help, the more you will be blessed. God is watching 24/7 my friend.

So choose not to disappoint the ones who believe and depend on you. Be a Donaire!

Preparing for the future because they do not want to be a disappointment to those who believe and depend on them.

Write Your Story NOW!

We do not know her story. But we very well know we can make our own story. Make it beautiful!

 

The photo above was taken last month at the St. John Baptist Parish Church in Calamba,Laguna. It was Tuesday afternoon, past four o’clock. Inside the church, there were only about five people praying. It was silent. It was peaceful. Outside, there were about five people in the church’s backyard. They were praying and lighting a candle.

Then a young couple arrived and went in. They shelled out coins and put them in the woman’s disposable cup.She immedietly picked the coins, counted them, then put them on her pocket. From where I was standing, I have mentally counted five coins in P1 denomination. Then my companion put a piece of cupcake to her cup. That was the last scene I saw.

On my way out, I whispered a prayer for her. I prayed that she will be taken cared of by authorities, like the local social workers. Where could have been her relatives? Does she have children? Why was she left there begging? What could be her story that brought her there? How much money will she gain at the end of the day?

For sure, the amount of money she can receive from churchgoers will not be enough for the long haul. Maybe it can buy her needs for a day or two. What about for the day after that or for next week or next month? We do not know her story but one thing is clear her future depends solely to kind-hearted souls now. She cannot go back in time and prepare for what is to come. She is now in her twilight, what will happen to those she will leave behind?

Her story is about to end. By the looks of it, I suspect it not does not happy details. It could be colorful but not cheerful. Hopefully, her story can have a happy ending. I really hope so. I will pray for it.

But her story, which might be unhappy by the looks of it, serves as inspiration to us younger and able ones. We all have chance to create a beautiful story. We just have to think look term and bear in mind that our actions at present are all for the future. The choice is ours what kind of ending do we want for our own story. What do you choose then?

Write your story now. If the details are not beautiful, it is time to rewrite it. Think long term. Live simply. Prepare for tomorrow.

 

ACT ON IT!

 

 

 

 

“Isipin ang future.” This was award-winning actor Coco Martin’s answer when asked by Boy Abunda on The Buzz last Sunday, what is his grandmother’s constant advice to him. That is why he is working hard and giving his everything at work or why he srikes when the iron is still hot so to speak. He has no complaint.

Imagine he has tapings for his ABS-CBN toprating primetime series Ikaw Lamang, he was doing his reunion project (their first was Idol series in 2010) with Popstar Princess Sarah Geronimo via the movie “Maybe This Time” which will open in theaters nationwide on Wednesday, May 28. The movie tells the story of childhood friends Tonio (Coco) and Monica (Sarah) who parted ways and eventually reunited after how many years. This time the guy is in a relationship with no less than the girl’s boss. He thought they had something, but she made it clear, there was none.

Reports say, both have undeniable chemistry. The movie will reportedly match if not surpass, in the kilig department to the films Sarah starred in with John Lloyd Cruz. And if you keep going back to the moviehouse during the showing of monster hit Starting Over Again (the highest grossing movie this year so far) starring Piolo Pascual nd Toni Gonzaga, you will intrestingly do the same in this Sarah-Coco starrer. It is absolutely a “Valentine Summer “, they say.

Anyway, because of the movie, Coco had promotional activities are left and right, guesting here and there to insure the movie’s box-office success. These are draining and tiring, you know. To say it ‘s a hectic schedule would be an understatement. No it’s a killer sched!

Coco is doing all these, simultaneous with his commitments for his various product endorsements which could be appearances or interviews to promote the brand. Where does he get the energy and strength for all these? Yet he is never complaining. And now it can be told, his grandmother’s advice is his driving force, his adrenaline, his energy pill.

For Coco there is no turning back because gone are his very struggling years growing up. He is now Coco Martin: Prince of Indie Films, award-winning actor, most sought after product endorser and one of tinseltown’s hottest properties.

He is definitely preparing for the future. How about you? What about us? No, I’m not waiting for Coco to tell me, “There was never...us.” I’m asking you and even my self. How prepared are we or what have we been doing for what is to come? 

Of course, I’m aware of what is written in the bible: Do not worry about tomorrow for tomorrow will worry about itself. But it does not mean that we will just sit all day, doing nothing at all. No we have to do something. After all there is a saying that goes, “Do your best and God will do the rest.” That means the action should come from us humans and God will deliver what is meant to be and what is for us.

So are you thinking of the future? Me, I don’t just think about it, I’m actually doing something about it. You should follow through as well. For a start, browse my other articles and you will find the answer from there, on what you should do and how to prepare for the future. Don’t just think about it, ACT ON IT!